news [archive 39]

15.01.2009: my new favourite quote:

"you need copyright as an incentive for people to create".

thank you john kennedy, president of the IFPI, you truly are a genius. a hollow soulless capitalist piece of worthless shit genius who knows nothing of passion or creativity. he follows it up nicely, "if you believe music is important to you then you respect music and cooperate with those who are producing the new music that you need for your commercial business model. and what we need most protection against is the stealing of that music". i'm taking that a little out of context, but still. it's funny how important these middle men think they are. and they are running scared.

i've been watching good copy bad copy. you can too (for free).

here's another good one (not the same person) - "major records stores have closed, such as tower records, which is really sad". which is really not sad. what was sad was when all the independant record shops closed down ten years ago because they couldn't compete with the ubiquitous trash of HMV and virgin. now those horrible fucking corporations are getting exactly what they deserve. doom.

death to copyright. kill the fucking music industry. we have everything to gain and nothing to lose.

13.01.2009: what i said..

earlier tonight the police did a 'preventative' mass arrest of 100 people at a palestine solidarity demo in town. the cops could only control themselves for so long, the blood thirsty mother fuckers. and the demo had looked so beautiful too as i'd passed it on the bridge aross the lakes (never a good place to pass a demo in copenhagen - be warned). the city was again swamped by fog. then blue lights and tear gas, etc.

a press photographer (and i'm presuming innocent) motorist were peppersprayed (amongst others? i don't know). the idea behind pepperspray (and the upcoming stunguns when they're given them) is they're only supposed to be used in situations where the police would otherwise have been forced to draw their guns. well, so much for that. although, a 13 year old palestian girl did prove herself a particularly good shot by managing to smash one of the arrest bus windows with a rock. i'm not sure whether she was actually inside it at the time or not.

i can still hear sirens out the windows now.

i've been playing a lot of indie platform games recently. i don't know why, but by far my favourites are eversion and an untitled story. they're both too hard but i can't help forgive them. eversion you can complete in a few hours, but an untitled story i've been hacking away at for months now. it's huge. now you know what i spend my time doing.

and what the hell is with these stupid home chip and pin readers? i thought it was an april fools joke when i first saw it (and it's january, that's how surprised i was). have they any idea how fucking inconvenient they're going to be? whenever i travel i have to lug a card reader around with me too? i quite like not needing my physical card to make online purchases. and i bet they're not willing to send it me in denmark either. maybe they've realised what a terrible mistake "verified by visa" was and totally freaked out in the process. morons.

baked beans, spinach and peas though. makes me happy. also my second batch of bhajis. i took two for lunch at my language class and the indian guy was quite interested. i gave him some and he told me "det smager rigtig godt". next time i'm adding spinach and potatoes. pakora. i need me some green chillis.

11.01.2009: speaking of which (ungdomshuset), i finally made it into the new house on saturday. when i'd first seen it way back at the opening party i was really impressed. it looked like a fortress. i'd tinged it in all colours of post-apocalyptic madmax bullshit. probably just from all the army netting and camo stuff, the smoke and pounding beats. but, actually going there on a saturday night it wasn't quite so.. inspiring.

currently it's only about a quarter of the space i thought it was. there's only the one room that's public, and it's not exactly spacious. it was packed, but compared to how many people used to be in ungdomshuset on a saturday night it was nothing. being miles out of town doesn't help either, i'm sure.

the sound was rubbish too (sorry mr dready sound engineer), but the beer's still cheap and the bands were fun. there's potential, i guess. and the extra space that's coming in april will hopefully solve the problems.

you should see the state of my shoes though. how did they get so damn dirty? maybe it has something to do with the fake blood that emil and mathias spat out all over the crowd.

earlier in the evening kenneth had joined us for dinner (like my segue there?). we cooked vegan lasagna and vegan rhubarb crumble. the dinner turned out way better than i'd hoped. the lasagna was sans cheese and with a delicious white sauce made with soya milk and margarine (which i'd never normally use). the cheese wasn't missed at all. my dinners are not suffering by me being dairy free, and i like that.

and about the murder of oscar grant, there were riots after all. except they don't sound very impressive. smashing restaurants, a pharmacy and a hair salon? that does not sound cool. jumping on cop cars is all good though.

10.01.2009: 4pm and it was the perfect weather for a riot. a thin mist settles low in the city, the grey of mid-winter, a dreamy medieval atmosphere that's totally shattered by the first flashbang as it explodes barely a meter infront of the cop car. i jump my bike and sidestep the action. around the corner coming a fucking army, marching. the people at the front their faces covered with palestinian scarves. but the cop car does nothing. so i wait and see how it'll play out. if this was ungdomshuset the riot vans waiting patiently in the side streets would have been blocking the road by now.

a guy runs past, he's telling his friend someone at the start of the demo had thrown a molotov. but it can't be true. the demo, even made up largely of families and kids, would never have gotten this far if a molotov was involved. and it's a large demo too, the people are still coming around the corner as the space infront of the parliament begins to fill up with black, white and green, red triangles.

seeing so many people protesting, i couldn't help but smile. but what's to smile at? all these people, they all have friends and family trapped in a cage full of maniacs. their anger is more than understandable. the riots that broke out in oslo shouldn't have been a surprise. the only thing that confuses me is that they have nothing to target their anger at here. and perhaps this is why the cops didn't intervene and fuck everything up. the situation is a little too unpredictable. but after the mess left in oslo there's no doubt the copenhagen cops weren't prepared for the worst. and ungdomshuset has taught them well. it's just interesting seeing how differently they're treated.

in the end there was no fire. but walking deeper into town you could still hear the occasional bang. down every other side street was the reflection of flashing blue lights. and then another group of people would march past, shouting and chanting. flags waving. is it like this all over the world? i can only hope.

we walked off to try and buy some vegan cheese. foolishly. 8 slices for 35kr? it's not even real.

08.01.2009: here we are again, back where we started three years ago (was it three years? must have been). copenhagen in january. cold. six hours of sunlight. if you can call it that. it's awesome.

but whatever, unimportant. did you read about the guy shot by san fransisco transport police? no, nor did it.

when the californian police who beat rodney king are equitted in 1992 it sparks six days of riots, clocking up "53 deaths, 2,383 injuries, more than 7,000 fires, damages to 3,100 businesses, and nearly $1 billion in financial losses". when police in greece shoot and kill 15-year-old alexandros grigoropoulos there's over a month of rioting and occupations. there's a basis for a full scale insurrection. but when a guy is murdered in cold blood by a cop in america in 2009 (just) and it's caught on two video cameras, there is what? nothing. fuck all.

and i feel sick

so changing subject rapidly. have i anything else to say? i shouldn't.

my experiments in the art of the onion bhaji is going quite well. i hope

and i think it's funny i received three books for xmas and they're all square. i like that.

i've been back in copenhagen a few days. i've had two language classes, both times with me worrying i was going to be on my own, but in the end there have been six of us each time (out of the nineteen on the teacher's list). better late than never. and we got her to write "for satan" on the board, which i found endlessly amusing. i've also taken two shifts at fisk, both times with me actually being on my own, which i quite like. i get to do whatever i want, listen to my own band (inflict my own band on those people who will stay there for four repeats of the CD), and not do any of the crap jobs (because i don't have time and can't leave upstairs abandoned). drink as much as i can handle. or more. then i had band practice and my ears are still probably ringing, i can't even tell anymore. getting back to the groove was great. it had been too long. and i can't remember how to play any of the bass on the songs we recorded. to be honest, i made most of it up as i went along.

and then what else? i fixed the vacuum cleaner. i managed to find some gram flour. i this and that.

a guy in fisk asked me about a certian coat, if i knew if it was a man's or a woman's coat. what to say?

but these bhajis are amazing. and they're not even deep fried.

eating pomelo now. i love pomelo. it's a beautiful smelling fruit

so why don't you hope over the to the drunken butterfly website and sign our guestbook? i'll pay you. in kind, at least.

04.01.2009: you disappear for a few days and the world goes to shit. world, i throw a shoe at you. or would if vegan shoes weren't so expensive. i was trying to catch up on the news all night but it's just too difficult. none of it makes sense. you're all fucking maniacs.

i'm currently on a bus whizzing through sweden. we just stopped in gothenburg and the guy with tourettes finally got off. i couldn't take his tuneless, rythmic (and incredibly high-pitched) whistling any longer. although, i think i preffered it when it wasn't quite so busy in here. these coaches now come complete with power sockets and free wifi, which is just amazing. you can miss all the lovely scenery whilst basking in the safety of the internet. i can video chat with martin and show him sweden. and it'd be great if only the sun wasn't constantly in my eyes. and if i could concentrate enough to actually do any work. it's not looking likely.

i think i'll just read my book instead. or catch up on all the lost sleep. i couldn't have had six hours last night. but anyway.

it's just a shame that it was pitch black when we got on the bus, and it will be again when we get off.

phweee.. sweden

03.01.2009: i slept terribly. my brain endlessy churning. cataloguing and ordering minor scenes from my life in brighton. trying to put it all back together. reliving it in the third person. trying to identify the tiny moments and choices that led me to here, sleepless in a tiny cabin in the mountains of norway, hundreds and hundreds of miles away from anything i ever thought i'd know. i was trying to settle my mind on a thought that would loop quietly and let me sleep, but it wouldn't come. i just wound myself further and further into a confusing spiral of contradictory memories and startlingly clear yet completely unimportant images that i just couldn't shake. every story appears linear and distinct in time, seperated from all others. so none of this makes sense and my brain continues to churn and i become more and more unsettled. right about now i'd text aimee and go over to her place for a cup of earl grey. sit on her balcony. everything would be fine and the cat would continue to climb its long ladder into the kitchen opposite.

but instead i must wait until morning when everything will dissipate. all will be fine.

except morning comes too soon. but that's ok, because morning solves everything still.

we're driving back to oslo now, the cabin all cleaned and shut down, and i'm frustrated at the beautiful scenery that's completely unphotographable from the car. it's epic and never ending. at least until spring. coffee from the 'by the way' cafe (i want to call it a truck stop, but it's not) is sloshing in my stomach and buzzing around my head. i can smell it still. already. everything is blue and white. out the window it may as well be random patterns. shotgun saturation and brightness. a finely detailed pollack. and with the moon hanging always in the sky it's almost as if the world has just been inverted. i want to eat it. consume it all. i need to burp.

and as soon as i get a wifi signal for more than ten seconds i'm going to upload six posts all in one go. so sorry about that. although i'm not exactly sure who i'm apologising too.

02.01.2009: i was going to write "we just got back from skiing and.." but it was actally a few hours ago now. it took that long to shower and eat lunch and put the skis away and get the cabin warm and all that stuff. the one thing that makes me really feel at the cabin, what reminds me i'm here and conjours up all the memories of previous times, it's the smell of the washroom. that warm and slightly damp clean smell. it's great.

anyway. we had a great tour. the weather was brilliant. we've had perfect weather the whole time we've been here (that means it's going to be terrible tomorrow when we need to leave, or maybe it means i should just shut the fuck up). out in the mountains it's a proper winter wonderland. everything is coated frosted in white, especially in the dips where the sun can't reach. and it hasn't snowed for a while so the ground's crispy surface has crystallized into flakes that make the best gentle crashing noise when you knock them about. like flakes of cereal but a hundred times more delicate. the sky turns opalescent and i'm in awe of its size.

but when i'm not losing control on the rough downhills i think i'm getting the hang of this skiing lark. i can actually tell what a technique is now. today we skied about 12km and i didn't get particularly tired. not like i sometimes do. what everyone needs to realise is when you start learning to ski you're very inefficient and get exhausted extremelly quickly. that's when you start messing up and falling over. and hating skiing. but yeah, i really enjoyed our trip today.

photo time. these two were taken down in the valley:

this next one is kransekage, a scary norwegian celebration cake that's made of almonds and sugar and more sugar and maybe some honey too. it's very sweet and very addictive and very good dipped in coffee:

some random photos:

balloon monsters:

perhaps you can't tell, but that's a stegasaurus (with fangs, yes).

and finally, photos from our walk yesterday:

what else do i need to write about? julie asking me to kick her dad's ass at backgammon, but then complaining when i beat him too badly? pyah.

and i'm the only person who hasn't napped at all. do i get a prize?

for dinner i'm making borscht with all the leftover vegetables. it's almost as if our last meal up here was planned.

01.01.2009: norway recently banned firework rockets. right before new years. great timing. it wont stop anyone. they'll just drive down to sweden or something.

so fireworks shooting up everywhere around the lake. shadows flashing and jutting out across its smooth flat surface, shards of trees in all colours filling the expanse. us just a bunch of idiots standing there in the middle waving our mini sparklers (lit with great difficulty) and shouting offensive rubbish. we popped a bottle of champagne and lost a bottle of gin. we wrote "rike faen" (something like "rich fucks") in huge inverted snow letters for everyone to see.

i only realised i'd lost the gin on returning to the cabin so we had to go back out on a rescue mission. and apparently we totally wrecked the nearby ski trail too. sorry.

but it wasn't as drunken and raucous as i could make out. not really. but it probably was the drunkest i've been up here.

memories of previous new year celebrations include running back from lee's palace in the beautiful snow, me and grilly walking the streets of london at 4am soaked in rain and dark rum, a naked guy having sex with a christmas tree, sleeping under a table and having my cover stolen in the night, taking a lonely stroll through the morning forest and then saying goodbye to aimee as she drives off in the van, walking through the red paper firework ashes in the streets of amsterdam. these are all good memories. they're all of the aftermath.

and all good clean fun. i haven't been sick on new years eve/day since guppy brought a bottle of baileys around our house. he thought he could bribe us with posh alcohol (at the time baileys was posh, or something). i threw up down my pwei tshirt three times. i think. we should never have allowed him round.

anyway, the stupidity of youth. these days i'm only ever sick from food poisoning.

which reminds me, i've been doing a lot of cooking with dried beans and pulses. i've never really cooked with dried stuff before (apart from dal). it's very interesting. but difficult when you're not planning ahead. soaking is a real pain in the ass. and these guys eat so much. no matter how big a pan i use, how much food we cook, there are never any leftovers. it's quite amazing to watch. food just disappears.

30.12.2008: i've spent all day preparing curry and making a new drunken butterfly website. me and emil just chilling in the cabin whilst everyone else went out for a huge ski. i like hanging at the cabin, stoking the fire and keeping the cold at bay. comfy and some vague approximation of remote.

the curries were great (some kind of potato, cauliflower and chickpea korma and a split pea and mushroom thing, which really was great). and the website is coming along nicely too. you might be able to preview it here.

but i am the cabin chef. yesterday we had iraqi pink rice (from my 'axis of evil cookbook') and the day before i rocked a super fine roast. it was beastly.

we went for a ski yesterday and i got all angry because it's difficult and i kept hurting myself. getting back into skiing is always hard. and sometimes it can be difficult to get the will to persevere, especially when the start is the hardest part and you just can't do it. perhaps it's the fresh snow that make the slopes harder, or perhaps they've not been groomed very well, i don't know. tomorrow i'll try again and hopefully not get frustrated.

ski poles squealing with their perpetual snow stabbing torment.

but we did win at trivial pursuit. and we're going to do it again too.

julie is still humming drunken butterfly songs.

we also did some good chainsawing. and julie cut down another tree, but i don't want to remember that because it was a bit scary. the bastard just didn't want to come down. they were pushing it, making a right meal, but in the end it was ok. its fall angle was perfect.

28.12.2008: i think what i like most about being up here is the light. the whole day is a sunset. there's no pure red or green, everything is bright blue and golden. something like the swedish flag, how distasteful. here's a poor comparison to illustrate:

maybe i can find a better example and change it without anyone noticing.

there's also loads of fantastic ice crystals everywhere:

and whiskey too (not shown).

oh to have a macro lens..

28.12.2008: i wasn't going to get my laptop out, but the image of me and emil sitting in the back of the car, both of us with our computers on our knees and julie sitting between us, it was too much resist. it's a shame too because the scenery is so beautiful. so many shades of frost, everything tinged with whiteness. jutting rock. these curvy norwegian roads, bending round the hills and the lakes all frozen, tiny colourful people venturing out on their skates.

we flew with ryanair. everytime i do this i promise i never will again. they are scum absolute. i'd received an email from them in advance warning that christmas crackers are not allowed onboard and any wrapped presents in your hand luggage will be unwrapped. they're unnecessarily uptight, and excess baggage is priced disgustingly. also, they only allow one extra carrier bag of duty free shopping. so of course people are going to be pissed off. but we had no problem. we'd spent all morning trying to get our luggage as light as possible. my dad has set up a weighing station and we gave up at around 17kg. at the airport both our bags weighed in at exactly 15.1kg. so fuck you ryanair. there was plenty i had to leave behind but i got the important stuff. our hand luggage weighed a ton (or thereabouts) but they luckily weren't weighed, the staff were too busy trying to restrain an angry woman who was in turn trying to control her kids. i was too hot and tired to care at that point, wearing way too many of my heavy clothes, my coat and trouser pockets bulging with books and cds and every kind of spice. i still can't believe there isn't a market for flight clothes.

my big stupid mistake was the fireworks. i only realised i'd packed them after the luggage had been checked in. for some reason i hadn't thought about it before, about fireworks clearly not being allowed onboard, and for very good reason. we did a danger assement and decided to let it go. if i'd gone back and told them my bag would never have made it on the flight and i'd be totally fucked. knowing ryanair i'd never see the bag again. and they were only sparklers (only?). but it was fine, and that's my story about smuggling banned items onto planes. perhaps i shouldn't be shouting about it. i better really enjoy them now.

we stopped for waffles and coffee (240kr) and now we're off again. skidding across the snowy roads, stopping only to pick up a few choice items from kiwi (green coloured norwegian supermarket) and to attach chains to the car tyres. to the mountains! to the cabin!

anyway. happy second christmas.

26.12.2008: christmas is nearly dead, we just threw out the remains of the leftovers. and what else is there? chocolate and mince pies and lots of bad films. two beers (of the a-z) and random wine. not much.

except that tomorrow we're off to norway to do it all again. it's tiring but it's good.

the food has been epic. christmas dinner took the whole day to prepare and it fed us all twice. steamed mushroom pudding, nut roast, quorn roast, sage and onion stuffing, all of the above. roast veg, sprouts and chestnuts, orange sauce and gravy and cranberry sauce. best dinner ever.

louis armstrong, billie holiday, glenn miller, nat king cole, nina simone, ella fitzgerald.

so what did everyone get? i got a tie, a mammut mug, and a helicopter. sushi fun. and my new favourite shoes of course. some hats, some books, etc. we had a good long present opening session. now i have to get down to packing. and with any overweight baggage charged at 15quid a kilo, it has to be packed well (i distinctly remember saying i wanted nothing heavy this year, but i fucked it up myself anyway by buying trivial pursuit and etc blah blah).

we had a drunken christmas eve, with the boys and all. we braved the pub, thinking ben had stopped off for a cheeky one on the way over, and it was absolutely crazy out. the smell of smoke has been replaced by sweat. and ben wasn't even there, he'd had the sense to go to a nicer pub. but it's still much nicer at home anyway.

today we've been out walking in the woods. fresh air and english country side.

i'm not enjoying this. i shouldn't be writing because i don't actually have anything to say. force of habit. too apathetic after so much food and drink.

23.12.2008: sitting here waiting for words to happen. never going to happen. here's photos instead:

martin brought round his three player chess board. it's my new favourite game. and it's totally nothing like chess. it's a much more sociable game, in ways that i find hard to explain. in ways that involve ever changing co-operation and competition. you can do quite well playing the diplomatic pacifist. it's definitely not just a silly gimic and a confusion of rules (which need discussing as you play). it's very interesting.

martin also brough a skewb, which is driving me mad. and i want one.

but we've had some lovely guests. aimee came on saturday. grilly came on monday. julie will be coming tonight. and none of it is time enough. i hate it how infrequently i see my friends. but then, i don't hate the lifestyle choices that i've made. so..

happy xmas.

20.12.2008: in the mornings it feels like summer. the bright sunlight filling the sky. the warmth from the radiator. all that's missing is the leaves on the tree. although the black plastic bag is still there, since at least before summer, skewered, wrapped and caught amongst the branches. the only thing hanging there.

then the next day it's not like summer at all. the sky's a freshly drained carcass. and that's my first thought when i wake up. what exactly is it that's wrong with me? it was much more endearing when i was actually a teenager.

walking round sainsburys. if i catch myself singing 'the holly and the ivy' one more time i will kill myself.

and tk maxx. i should loathe the place, but it's so easy. brands and labels just become immaterial. so i bought my first pair of cordroys. ever. i always used to hate them, and for little good reason. when i was ten or eleven the smelly kid in class always used to wear cordroys. that was the association, that they smell. but nevermind, i needed more black clothes.

and the polish shop was interesting. it was like walking into another country, one where no one speaks english. we bought a pastry and a bag of mushrooms flavour crisp. which are brilliant, by the way.

what i don't understand is how you can have global economic growth? isn't one person's growth another's loss? isn't it a bit of a closed system? idiots and assholes, the lot of them.

18.12.2008: been making mince pies all day. all very christmassy. none of your folded paper strip nonesense.

but now i'm exhausted. slept weirdly in my old bed. the matress is all wonky and the duvet was a little too deep pan. you couldn't wrap it around yourself. and i woke up at 5:30 with cold feet and stomach pains. i want to blame the beer i drank, not the indian, because the food was so good. i miss english indian cooking. and then when i woke up i got confused because all the clocks in my room are wrong. now i feel jetlagged, which is just ridiculous.

we had a nice time in town. even though it is rugby. especially when i was thrown out of a newsagents because i had my hood up. what are people scared of exactly? these english people are so uptight it's painful. i just bought a tiny rubiks cube from woolworths.

and RIP you wont really be missed either.

pop goes the weasel

now it's time to start the a-z beers.

17.12.2008: by the time you read this (maybe by the time i get around to uploading this) i'll be in england. i'm there (here) until the 27th, from which date i'll be in norway until sometime before the 5th of january. something like that.

i'm packing crazy style right now. things are too complicated.

what am i forgeting? apart from a 't'.

ripping teeth from a fox skull. that's the present i got yesterday. fox teeth in a jar. fantastic.

and as much as i detest christmas, it's kind of cute seeing people cycling around in santa hats. i've even been enjoying my christmas shopping. it's been done in short and painless bursts. the extra intensity in the smell of braendtemandler filling the streets. millions of tiny lights wasting our precious energy. blah blah blah. now i have a bunch of presents, but i can't decide who to give what.

some photos from the drunken butterfly recording sessions:

photos of me by jolle and kenneth (in that order). there are many more but these were chosen for a special purpose.

kenneth: we look so evil in the playing pics
laurence: we are channeling the rock
or should i say metal?
kenneth: yeah, metal!

anyway, i have a date with an airbus. i hope to fall in love with you soon.

15.12.2008: hurray for monday 8am. i dreamt all night about recording and mixing. doing overdubs. we had a great fourth track. it had a dark hiphop reggae thing going on. i really need to get this stuff out of my head.

like being chased by a giant lego boulder.

this morning i've spent two hours in a copy shop. makes me want to bust out a fanzine again. black and white, diy. hardcore. and it was 600kr well spent.

yesterday we were making danish christmas things out of paper ribbon and drinking lots of low-alcohol glogg. listening to reggae christmas songs (oh, that's where that came from) and making marzipan things. it was very.. hygge. this was at kenneth and katrina's place. they'd even made a nisserman scene in their kitchen. it was beautiful.

saturday night was the studenterhuset volunteer christmas party. it was mildly wild. i was roped into participating in the beer chugging competition. we'd already drank at least one beer and taken two shots of schnapps (and that was before dinner), and i'd never actually downed a whole pint before. i'm 27 and i never killed a whole beer? but me and jolle teamed up, his beer disappearing in seconds (i looked away and missed it) and i managed mine in two gulps, only spilling a little into my beard. the problem was that i didn't know we had to sit on the front of the stage once we'd done, so we didn't win. we came second, but whatever. at least i didn't get involved in the lap dancing. that was just ugly.

and there ended my non-dairy diet. i was planning to quit at christmas, and this was kind of christmas. but all there was for us to eat was cheese and eggs and coleslaw. there was bread and some good cabbage stuff too. but unfortunately the "vegetarian only" table had been cleared before we managed to get to it. i guess they underestimated the number of vegetarians. that's good, i guess, that there were so many of us. but danish christmas dinners are all about "meat, meat and more meat".

and i was too happy with the "destroy 2000 years of culture" graffiti in the toilet. i sing the song of freedom to hate. you should feel guilty if you're just watching. but i had no pen of my own. every heart is a revolutionary cell.

anyway. i really want to talk about the special project we've been working on. but can't, because it's a surprise.

11.12.2008: i was going to have a "creative day" today. but this doesn't feel very creative.

here's what i ate yesterday (i know this kind of shit is classic livejournal trash, writing about what you had for breakfast, but i feel compelled): porridge made with half soya milk and half water, with a whole apple and a few dates, cinammon and nutmeg. toast with tahini and a lettuce, tomato and onion sandwich. then for dinner, rice with kidney beans, spinach, celery, onion and garlic, with mashed sprouts and carrots. what am i missing?

but anyway. since i'm done with my first danish module i think it's time to upload all the doodles i've accumulated whilst i wasn't paying enough attention. here's what i photographed at fisk yesterday:

it's weird that i've started doodling so many animals. that's new. but all what's new. i want to compare them to the crap i was doodling in geography lessons and on those rainy evenings in 1994. and i've progressed where? nowhere:

killing chickens, heads turned into pumpkins. steam licks and curls it way from the sink. escape from the sewers of doom. the other day i heard the latest indiana jones movie had no traps in it. perhaps the movie was the trap. l'esprit d'escalier.

and julie has got totally obsessed with this house with crazy christmas lights. it's amazing, it's in time to music, which you can hear by tuning in your car radio. she drives past it every day but the display is always off, so she left them a message on the website and they switched it on for her.

me, i'm obsessed with natzke. the art is nice but the process is incredible. this is what i want to be doing. right. so, i'll get on with it then.

10.12.2008: my favourite thing at the moment is waking up and seeing that it's still early and i can go back to sleep. it's totally the best.

and it's cool because i feel like i can chill out a little now. my danish test was yesterday and i passed with flying farver. finally i can forget all about stupid ahmed, karen and mona (the characters from the books i had to read). we all did good. me and my partner, our special trick was to make the examiner laugh at our answers. and it worked. although she had way too much eyeliner on. it was a bit creepy.

now i have a total fucking coffee hangover. too much time at fisk and studenterhuset today, moving between the places where i can get free/cheap coffee. stupid me.

this is more interesting. i give you (durum roll) the oitonomous:

so what is that? nazi punk or gay porn? it's hard to tell with those guys. but i have to admit that i'm also in this band (and as a disclaimer, we're anti-fascist all the way and i told them if they want to use the word "cunt" they need a new guitarist). in a couple of hours we managed to write and record three new songs. one about beer, one about cops and one about closing the factory. proper nice and simple. no complicated bridges or outros, they're much too white collar for us. some shit like that. i'm really happy how the photos came out though, as lighting is a nightmare in that room. i guess i'm lucky they're so pasty. songs coming soon.

another of my current projects involves the advent calendar that julie's parents bought her. it was very nice of them, but since it's haribo none of the contents are edible. i thought i'd fix the little disappointment by refilling it with my own goodies. so far it's included lots of exciting choclate, a book (an awesome christmas disney book, their first one from 1994, they love that shit here), a very cute frog keyring, masses of tea, a condom, etc. i'm a good boyfriend. i just hope she's not expecting a present on christmas day. er, lol.

i've been looking back through all my photos as i've been meaning to recollate a selection of my favourites, but there's so many and it's so hard. anyway, i noticed i get sentimental at the weirdest photos. i've been trying too to work out what it is that resonates, but i can't place it at all. you don't realise how much you forget. i'm talking the post-midnight shit proper now. must stop.

06.12.2008: i woke up this morning with a vague feeling of another time and place. late spring or early summer maybe. brighton maybe. way back when at high school maybe. somewhere slighty fresher and greener. gentle smell of ozone. i don't know. i woke up too fast to place it, suddenly realising it was almost 11am. but for a minute there. yeah.

i'm feeling xmassy in a good way. i've had a few gloggs (mulled wine, near enough) and enough burnt almonds. i'm enjoying the city all lit up with the pretty lights, even if they are bit shit and for all the wrong reasons. even carol singers can be cute when they're singing in a language you can't understand. when they're not knocking your door.

last night i borrowed a tie and played at barman for the fisk reggae night. we did very well (taking 14,000kr for the whole day). and i'm proud of the glogg i made. most places use a mix, but since we only sells organic we had to make it from scratch. i did good, i think. we also sold out all the beers, which is a small miracle. and i only had to deal with one patronising asshole. another miracle. he wanted me to heat his sticky drink using the milk steamer. he was such a cock about telling me i went back and told him i'd do it but only if he'd clean it afterwards. perhaps he didn't understand how the place was run, all by volunteers, and i wasn't going to let such rudeness go so easy. "i don't think that's going to work". he said it like he always gets his way. like he's too rich and important not too. and i can hear myself telling him he can have it fucking cold or in his face. i can hear myself telling him he can stick it up his skinny fuckhole. but again i suffer from not being the person in charge. oh, and it's a charity as well. for the greater good i can suffer the scum . something like that.

the guy who i let infront of me in the queue the other day was buying a single beer called "brutal". wow. wouldn't you let him infront of you too?

and we found a huge bee in our corridor. is that normal?

weather like this is for putting honey in your tea. i like my new soya milk. so then.

04.12.2008: what's the point of thursday anyway? i'm beginning to think it's a pretty stupid day. but nevermind.

i've finally collated my photos from france and can offer you a small selection:

if you're so inclined you could see more (about 39 more) on my proper france/charente photos page.

you can read about my charente journal too, but you might have to wait. it's not really worth waiting for.

i had something else to say. i guess it wasn't that important.

my weeks have been getting a bit formulaic of late. i blame the winter (which i'm thoroughly enjoying btw, apart from the cycling). but it's christmas soon anyway, and that'll shake everything up nicely i'm sure

03.12.2008: we had a monsterous practice. too long recording and we'd forgotten how fun it was to rock out. can i say "rock out"? i don't know anymore. but it was a fast driving rave-up with the drunken butterfly sixty minutes. all the way. the best shit that you never record and always forget. and we all came out with injuries, knackered wrists and cut up palms. bleeding ears, that kind of thing. it's a good job you weren't there. self-indulgence is what being a rock star is all about.

which reminds me - photos from our last gig (scroll down).

anyway, i've been angry all day. first this fuckhead in fakta pushed infront of me in the queue, knowingly and rudely. what boiled me over was my inability to confront him about him being so damn impolite. my danish skills aren't good enough and he wouldn't talk to me in english. the pigheaded fuckwit. then later i was working and i'd totally got over it. but did i ever mention the annoying woman at where i work? she's too rude too. she came in yesterday, made herself a latte, took three cakes, then sat herself down in the middle of the shop whilst claiming to be working and ate the lot. today she does the same, except she doesn't even stick around. she orders a taxi, grabs what was left of the cake and leaves for the other store. as far as i'm aware you're allowed to take certain food and drink whilst working, but that's when you're working a shift. nothing like what she does. she's weird. and if she wants to lose some weight she should stop eating so many fucking cakes. she also needs to mind her own business. also saying hello and goodbye might be nice. although, to be honest i'd rather her just be silent. i don't think she's ever actually made eye contact with me either. she's the queen of self-importance. oh, and did i mention she's a fucking ghastly bitch?


no, it's ok. it's just catharsis. interneting may be one of the least effective forms of cathartic behaviour, but at least it doesn't get you thrown in jail. at least not most of the time.

did you know i have an exam on tuesday?

01.12.2008: saw a dead swan this morning. all crumpled and bloodied. someone had placed it beside the bin at the bus stop. waiting there with all the commuters.

sunday was a nice and simple day. it went like this. i got up and showered. went to the shop to buy food for breakfast. made breakfast. tidied up some. did some work in the courtyard. invited some people over dinner. cleaned the bathroom. smashed my finger up. started cooking dinner. guests arrived, brought lots of joy and wine (and baileys, very classy, except i can't drink it). we were seven, we ate and chatted through all shades of conversation (topics we never normally touch on during dinner, nevermind with guests). it was a good night.

friday had been very similar. i got up and showered. went to the shop to buy food for a curry. cooked the curry. made breakfast. etc. that night was the fisk christmas dinner and we were both working there most of the day, i had to prepare our food in the morning. come 7pm i was tired and feeling unsociable. the night started horribly. there were lots of people i didn't know suddenly turning up and talking in small tight groups. the real problem was the fucking christmas music someone insisted on playing (to "put us in the christmas mood"). i'm surprised i managed to eat any food with such vomit inducing music. but there was good food - our curry, of course, then some lentil dish (cooked by a nutrionist with a similar diet to me) and various breads and salads. free bar. and suddenly it was a great night. we had a lot of sociable fun. there was a quiz and a weird dice game, like an advanced version of pass the parcel. before we knew it 1am had rolled around and we hadn't deposited the days takings at the bank yet. whoops. but best of all, a few weeks ago they got in a large yellow pot that we wanted to buy. we'd priced it at 150kr and put it aside, only to have another volunteer (although you wouldn't believe it considering she's in there every day throwing her weight around) doubled the price and said it came with these seven horrible and useless cup things. anyway, we served the curry in it and then asked the manager woman if we could buy it without the cups. and of course we could. so, hurray. we win.

saturday was for shopping. and it's been so long since we shopped. it was unsettling. christmas does that. but we did ok. there was only one shop we failed to get to, and that was because there was a queue out the front door. we only wanted coconut milk. you fucking maniacs.

"At the point when you have 700 riot police lined up against U.S. citizens, that's civil war. That's bigger than many battles of the American Civil War."

we missed junior eurovision. is it so bad if i download it?

28.11.2008: i recieved a sack in the post this morning:

and actual sack. it's huge. but unfortunately i can't tell you what's in it. only that it's beautiful.

last night we bailed on band practice for some hardcore research at lades kaelder - math rock. the headliners were the locust-esque adebisi shank (and not just because of the mask, give them a screamer and they'll kill). manic irish instrumental pedal rock, definately worth youtubing. also playing was obstacles and plok (with an umlaut on the 'o'), both local bands. perfect and beautiful music. they got me totally excited. especially plok. i even bought their cd. when was the last time i actually paid to own music? i can't even remember. but check them all out.

after the last band finished, 'will you smile again' was exploding in my head. it was making me bounce and i wanted nothing more than to hear it. then all of a sudden the dj played it. see, magic. and i can't believe lades kaelder is closing down. i've never seen a sub-par band there. maybe they shouldn't charge so much for the beers (i'm now spoiled by having a studenterhuset house card). blah blah blah.

far. whatever.

other music junk, i'm really liking 'why'. you can listen to them on my silly radio thing, but you'd be better off going straight to the source.

and kenneth says we're "louder than nirvana". technically. boom:

so i've been feeling quite busy recently. between school, preparing for my exam, consulting, and recording, i'm running out of time. if you do the maths it's pathetic. but i hate having so many things i need to do at the same time. i can't seem to do any of them.

and right now i have a whole lot of curry to make.

23.11.2008: i actually managed to get up before the sun set. days are short and light's become a sparse essential. so we walked through christiania, took a hot drink, sat waiting for snow that never came. just the sky greying. by the time i got home it was already dark. the day just folds into the void. and it takes a lot more than that to cure you after spending 12 hours at studenterhuset.

there again? it was a party for the cafe group, although i'm not entirely sure what that means, and i was working. there were also some great bands playing. 'cherry overdrive'(all girl all rock), 'a key is a key' (tallest band ever), and another band that might have been called something do to with melting water. it was a really good mix of music. and i'm never going to complain about having difficulty stomping on my effects pedals after watching cherry overdrive play whilst wearing high heels.

the local chef also cooked us up a hearty vegetarian pie, full of noodles and vegetables in a tomato and wine sauce, which i enjoyed along with my out-of-date bottle of porter i found at the back of the very shallow fridge (i'm the only non-paid person who ever does stock rotation, in the world). that's the shit right there. and because of it i can't moan that noone asked what i could or couldn't eat when ordering food in at the end of the night. the chef also made a very typical danish dessert that somehow involves apples and macroons and a lot of sugar, all mixed up in a giant fish bowl (i'm not even joking). it was so sweet i could feel my teeth sizzling.

and all the usual fun. then someone threw a snowball (iceball?) at me (or probably claus, he was just a shit shot) and it hit me square in the face. now i have a nasty cut on my nose and a slightly more bent pair of glasses. he was very apologetic, but who even does that? i was standing behind the bar at the time.

another time i'm standing behind the bar and kenneth points out into the crowd, "check out that guy's tshirt". he's a big guy, long dirty hair, he's looking quite smug and very punchable. this beige tshirt he's wearing says "statistically 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape". i point too, "hey you, check out your tshirt". he looks uncomfortable, us all pointing like that, but not as uncomfortable as he should. like he's presumed we think rape is as funny as he does. a beer later and he's at the bar again and i'm not letting it go. "so none of your friends have been raped then?". he has this awkward laugh, one that needs to be followed with his face being opened up. something like what you'd do to a banana. i just stand and glare at him and finally he fucks off. had it been my bar i would have said more. done more.

at least no one was caught pissing in the corner of the toilets this time.

also, three 'time out's in a row (within two minutes) is way too many.

and the ley just makes me happy, ok?

22.11.2008: i woke up feeling fantastic this morning (okay it wasn't the morning. but whatever). it's crazy how happy snow makes me. be it running down kobemagade, my eyes nose and mouth full of it, or just standing and watching it fall through the street lights, the ring around the round tower. snow falling into my coffee, covering my shirt. everyone with it in their hair. it cuts through you like a million tiny shards of glass.

when i woke up at 4am i'd been transported to narnia or something. the end of the street was invisible behind the sodium tinted blizzard. the cars had been replaced by mounds of snow. boom, just like that. amazing. only, i had no one to wake up and share it with.

more basement recording yesterday. we're sounding good. i've started drawing on the walls. and i have an idea for a music video, can anyone recommend software (open source if possible) for making a short video from camera stills? i'll upload some song previews once we're settled on a mix.

then afterwards, the massive china box and upstairs to watch some fantastic surf rock. i want to be in a surf band. or at least have a surf song. especially cool is how the band were all drinking from whiskey glasses on stage. that's nice. what's not nice is getting that beastie boys song stuck in my head.

i had some ranting to do. concerning "feminism" and people's idea of what that word actually means. but here is not the place for it. i also wanted to rant about how i can't take being told how stupid it is we'd want to do mushrooms. if you're at all informed at the subject, beyond the bullshit you're taught told at 'school', or have even the slightest experience, i might be interested in hearing your opinion. but like, "you're not my real mom". etc. and especially don't come telling me mushrooms are so damn dangerous when you smoke. that's just too much. really.

this morning my porridge is perfect.

wait. what is this, some kind of fucked up goldilocks syndrome thing going on?

21.11.2008: fuck, it's snowing. happy christmas everyone.

but it's too early for this. i can't even decide what to wear. it's too difficult. like i need to eat breakfast first but can't exactly sit in the kitchen in only my pants.

she's totally right about the duvet though. it really does need shaking every night. right now it resembles something that washed up in the tide.

last night i had a lovely dinner cooked for me by kenneth and katrina. i challenged them with vegan and they came through with a tasty stir fry. i always ruin my stir frys by throwing in veg as soon as it's chopped. and ignoring all the cool vegetables. er, are chestnuts even vegetables? but i digress. hoi sin from above ("also called suckling pig sauce", yummy). feminism, drugs and motorpsycho. lovely people. and it's nice to know katrina feels comfortable enough to go to bed whilst i'm still hanging out in her room. the three bottles of wine we drank might have helped. she even asking us to speak louder because she couldn't hear what we were talking about. very hospitable.

sp you'll be glad to know i've decided to go with a smart shirt today. i have smart shirts for special occasions. well i figure today should always be a special occasion. smoosh stoosh fuck it.

did you know smoosh are all vegetarians? brilliant.

the more golden and beautiful the sky turns, just the colder it's going to be in an hour.

laurence: you ever sneezed and followed through?
martin: sometimes
laurence: i mean.. follow through the other end
martin: damn! no. sick

there's really no need to ask me why i'm wearing a ley.

"children of the sun, see your time has just begun"

i put too much cinnamon in my porridge. again. i'm such a fuck up.

20.11.2008: wind like this, people will be blown from their bikes. you can see them veering in the cross wind. but it's still the best way to travel. i know this. although when it starts raining early morning i can't help but hope it carries through until early evening, so i have an excuse to take the bus to class.

this, and other worthless confessions.

julie's away in norway so i'm now completely untethered from any day rhythm you might class as 'normal'. it might be an interesting weekend. if i get a weekend.

it's not such bad timing. the 'fly are putting in some recording time and i'm spending many hours in our music dungeon. it's a lot of fun. the only problem is i can't take photos whilst recording because my camera is too noisy. i learnt this when we were filming the zombie film.

hey. one of my photos was going to be used in a korean book titled "ethics what we need for biotechnological future". there was only going to be 2000 copies, all in korean, but in the end they didn't use it. i get the feeling these people ask persmission for hundreds of photos, presuming a lot of people might say no. i also had a photo that was published in a cook book, and recently someone used one for the cover of their bands new album, but i haven't seen either of those yet (i saw the cook book on amazon, but i think it was cancelled). there was also talk of a magazine article on freeganism using some of my photos, but i've not heard back from them either. i should probably try and get a copy.

anyway, it's not so much the wind that makes cycling dangerous in copenhagen, it's the cyclists. this one guy cycled into the back of me as i was pulling off on a green light. he caught up with me and started shouting "blah blah kigger tilbage", or something along those lines. i can't believe he was giving me shit because he cycled into me. it was the old copenhagen classic, him trying to overtake in the third lane. his spokes clip my kick stand (which actually sticks out quite far) and this is my fault? to be really annoying i kept up with him, standing beside him at each red light for as long as a journeys over lapped, glaring at him from behind my scarf.

wow, how much fun could you have with a list of bnp members? that'll fix every rainy day until next fucking christmas. i'm linking to it because i find the heat map fascinating. also because some of those assholes actually live in my vicinity.

i put too much cinnamon in my porridge.

18.11.2008: sitting here drinking coffee and listening to 'yuri g'. i fucking love my job. it's like it's not really a job at all.

and "desecrate" would rank high on a list of my favourite words. also things i would like to do to you.

sorry, just being nasty because i can.

recently we've started watching a bunch of films filmed in toronto. the problem is that none of them are very good. the hulk was interesting, because you could clearly see the university campus and yonge street (the strip club and record shop etc), but ultimately rubbish. i survived because i spent the whole time watching the scenery and ignoring the plot. we watched jumper too, but couldn't see toronto at all. it was disappointing because i remembered their trucks on campus. the next film is hairspray, but i'm finding it difficult to gather enough strength and enthusiasm for it. i mean, that travolta asshole again? it's just too much.

hey, guess where emil is going on thursday?

other shit films i've seen recently includes 'deja vu'. i have a weak spot for stories involving time travel, there's my excuse right there (same excuse for seeing that smeared turd 'butterfly effect'). of course the film was rubbish, we know that, i'm only interested in how they deal with time, and right up until near the end i actually thought they were doing quite well. the surveillance machine was a good plot device idea (joey comeau does it better), but the whole laser pen thing was a major fuck up. their time model was reasonable, they seemed commited to a fixed timeline (relative to the film), where all interferences in the past had already happened (attempts to change things always result in the current observed timeline - time is solid and unalterable), but they abadoned it in the name of a pure american and non-sensical happy ending. gash. really it comes down what recursion you're looking at. stable timelines are fun (twelve monkeys), and fucked up ones are better (primer etc), but this film was just half arsed. plus there were too many unresolveable paradoxes. we can forgive it in terminator2, because it was a good one (and intentional), but 'deja vu' was just sloppy all over.

i had the most stupid comment. "this guy told me that vitamin tablets don't give you any benefit. if you're eating a proper diet". just, yeah. no commment necessary.

finally, here's a game that's clever enough for me to link to it. it's like tetris but with physics.

16.11.2008: where are we? that delicious sunday again. shoes and socks soaked through. drenched below the knee. any excuse to wear pajamas and get cosy. in denmark they don't do roaring fires. the sensible fools.

it feels like it's been weeks, but it's only since thursday. so, simple enough.

i left school early and sat at the studenterhuset bar eating my dinner of tasty cold lentils, reading about all the films i've missed at this years documentary film fesitval. kenneth was ill and neither me nor jolle could be bothered to do anything productive (like work on an acoustic set for a potential gig next month), so we took a table and drank mint tea whilst playing backgammon and being slowly overridden by indie girls. it would have been nice to stick around and see this band that's so very popular with the ladies, but i couldn't really face it.

and someone went and completely ruined my enjoyment of kobemagade by telling me the tweeting birds aren't birds at all, but recordings played to stop real birds from nesting there. your city is a fucking sham. i hate you for tricking me and i hate you more for pushing the birds away. you don't have a sliver of authenticity remaining. and you'll be left burning in the ruins when reality finally catches up with us. i swear.

maybe i'll start a "bring back the birds" campaign. i'd get halfway through before someone would point out that they are real birds after all. nothing is reliable.

friday was all little unimportant things. and in the evening it was the fisk shortfilm night which i'd agreed to help out at, making popcorn and selling beer etc. it was a quality night but i have little to say about it. too much salt, my bad. great fairtrade organic wine though, and a bargain at 65kr.

today we took brunch in the restaurant opposite the scientology building, always a good topic for dinner conversation. on leaving the restaurant we felt obliged to go and gawp at their window displays and laugh at the silly sci-fi illustrations and dramatic volcanoes. it was all fun and games until the guy inside noticed our apparent interest and came out to give us a free dvd. i explained that "we were only taking the piss". it's a very british phrase, and he probably didn't get my meaning, he said that it was ok and i had to wave the dvd away again. xenu xenu. xenu. poor guy, but how can you not be rude to them? i don't know.

and that was when it rained. like razorblades. but brunch was good, my only complaint being that they replaced something on the vege brunch with fish. for fuck sake. you'd think a chef would understand what vegetarian meant. it wasn't my plate anyway, the brunch had far too much cheese and yoghurt for me. my non-dairy diet has been going really well, i'm not going to ruin it on a nice brunch. and especially since i'd missed out on goat's cheese and whiskey cream the night before.

we'd had guests round and i'd cooked the best stuffed peppers i ever did cook. sliding them into the oven, i swear they were the best looking dish i ever baked. their awe made up for my total lack of meyer skills. i'm normally reasonably competent, but i went out first on almost all the games we played. i made up for it tonight playing cards, but still.

and i want new shoes, they have to be vegan and enviromentally friendly. if they're made from recycled car tyres and bike inner-tubes all the better. any recommendations? (that is, apart from going shopping covent gardens)

13.11.2008: i wasn't even going to leave the house. but sometimes circumstance finds you and your sitting at the front of an 'acid mothers temple' gig being pummeled by decibles rock and awe. frizzy hair flying all over in the air, masses. and long strands of whispy thin grey locks. thundering rock never looked so wise. this is music for the apocalypse. and outside nothing but a lonely silence, no street lighting along the dirt roads. all bin fires and loose dogs. it adds up, so i go back to my book.

"an hour later they were sitting on the beach and staring at the wall of smog across the horizon. they sat with their heels dug into the sand and watched the bleak sea wash up at their feet. cold. desolate. birdless. along the shore of the cove below them windrows of small bones in the wrack. further down the salt bleached ribcages of what may have been cattle. gray salt rime on the rocks. at the tide line a woven mat of weeds and the ribs of fishes in their millions stretching along the shore as far as eye could see like an isocline of death. glass floats covered with gray crust. the bones of seabirds. one vast sepulchre."

suffocating and utterly hopeless. 'the road' is our unavoidable future. there is no escape. and like the world's end in 'girlfriend in a coma', we're taking everything with us. pained and screaming. lifting the veil.

i think for now i'm taking a break from utopian/dystopian literature.

but the band finished and we were left with the dilema of where to go. we were mostly studenterhuseters, so that was to be our direction. there was talk of the subway, but at 1am it was no longer running. then there were taxis, but we were six and it was stupid anyway. ten minutes later we'd walked there and were all the better for it. we could have stayed better outside too, rather than inside, being tortured by the dreadful music of international student night. tortured by all kinds of things.

and then a hopeless search for a late bar. on a wednesday. i wasn't into it, i just wanted to go home, but i felt obliged to follow. like i was in and couldn't back out. after the third failure i quit and walked off, after a good handshake and a firm hug. i'd have left two hours before if i'd had my bike. it's easier to leave when you can actually get to where you want to go. but anyway, that's all probably lies. so nevermind.

i dreamt i was eating yoghurt and cream and milk.

and upstairs a woman is screaming. shouting. she's upset, whatever. and it's started to rain. if i'm lucky i wont have to cycle to class. somewhere there must be a rainbow.

11.11.2008: i might have mentioned it before, but it's not really the kind of thing you shout about, a kitchen infestation. it's not so much the occasional fly that bothers me, sure they're a bit annoying, they're just nowhere near as disgusting as their larvae. they get into everything, leaving webby trails through bags of spice, churning up pine nuts and sunflower seeds, just hanging out in the back corner of the cupboard. and you forget about them, because you rarely see them and would rather not think about it. but then all of a sudden they're curling around in your frying pan. burning the fucking bastards isn't enough. it was too much.

so on saturday we cleared out. everything that was sealed is now sealed and in an airtight container. anything that wasn't sealed has been garbaged. anything new that's bought is not being mixed with the old food, it goes in a new sealed box. and yes, we have a lot of containers. we also have a new sign:

cute no? we're now on day three and i'm wondering if anything needs to be done with onions.

i can't believe the kitchen has had this problem for over a year and we've not been able to sort it. anyway, now i'm purged and i can get them out of my mind. please.

10.11.2008: i'm a fucking rockstar, didn't you know? these and other such delusions start passing for normality once you've spend about twelve hours at studenterhuset. actually it kicks in after eight, once you're used to the smell from the toilet and you've succumb to the free flowing supply of alcohol. thirty beers is good payment for a forty minute gig, i think. they also gave me money to go buy myself a falafel and chips (everyone else had house cooked meat chilli), which i ate sitting alone at the bar just before opening time. sipping my free soda and enjoying everything. pulp. and then after the chaos, when all the lights were back on and the cleaning had been done, ten pizzas were ordered in for a pre-sunrise snack. even one for me.

from 5pm til opening i switched between helping set up, playing games, drinking organic sodas and sleeping on the sofa. snoozing felt good amongst the buzz of preperation. infact, it was the soundcheck that lulled me to sleep (once i'd accepted the fact we weren't getting one ourselves and i managed to relax). our melange of pedals and noise boxes needs some kind of soundcheck, no matter how vauge - to warn the sound woman if nothing else - and i lack a certain necessary confidence without one. but that's all remedied when walking on stage, bass finally plugged into the right DI box and letting rip with every stupid effect i've got. take that sound engineer.

the night was "maraton rock" and i believe it may be a yearly happening. there were five bands, starting at 9pm (in theory) and finishing sometime gone 1am. we were to start at midnight (and we're utmost professionals, didn't you know?). the first 'band' was a singer/songwriter affair, one guitarist and one singer. they were a good first band. they were followed by a three guitar indie band with a great sound, one you could tell they take very seriously. they were good and clearly talented, but played it safe. they will be great at weddings and bar mitzvahs. third was one of the bands we played with at stengade, they're more along our line of thinking and noisier than the previous bands. i do like a bit of shouting. and then it was our turn..

we started slow with '5-7' (named for a non-existent chord progression), i felt a bit timid on the bass, still not completely comfortable with what i'm playing, and only recently knowing what jolle was actually playing. halfway through i was warmed up and started getting into it, and just in time for 'stein' - our stoner song (stoner in concept if nothing else). it's ballsy and straight forward, verse bridge chorus etc (the ideal opener really). looking up from my strings all i could see was the white glare of the stage lights, i couldn't make out any faces in the audience, but then, could it be? people were moving. there was actual dancing. and then there was applause. i'm not used to that anymore. it was slightly strange. and i still didn't know where to look.

it was time for 'the song', the 25 minute epic that we played at stengade. i swore it wouldn't be wasted on only one gig, we'd worked too damn hard on it. and anyway, filling a full set without it would have been messy. and none of our other songs have such fantastic "spaz-outs". it's not a drunken butterly gig if jolle isn't on the floor, shaking and masturbating his guitar with a beer bottle. and it did have the most impressive spaz out, i was most proud of us. it even got a cheer. i fucking love that song. i wish i could put that noise into words. i'd be rich.

we decided the best way to follow was with our joanna newsom song, even if it was without the female vocals. for me it was the song i was most uncomfortable with, not knowing exactly what i was going to play and not being sure the notes were right with the chords either. but as a song it's strong, and jolle belts it out like a towering norse warrior. i played it sparse, but when the drums kick in halfway through i decided to get my act together. by the time we were picking through pocket linings, scraps of sassafras, it was time to make some noise. kenneth followed and it was beautiful. it was only once we'd stopped i noticed i'd been gritting my teeth.

it led beautifully into our final number, the short and sweet and very metal song (yet with such a cute intro). we reached the final straight, the last riff (a riff to end all riffs) and i wanted to keep playing forever. when the songs ends is decided by kenneth, and he kept it going a good lot longer than normal. it was magic, and whenever i shook my head i could see beads of sweat fly from the tip of my nose. then silence. then applause. suddenly i felt awkward being on stage. there was nothing for me to do. so i pulled my plugs and left as quick as possible. we had shouts for an encore but had played our time. besides, we'd only have gotten up and repeated the last song anyway.

the feedback was good. great actually. i was totally beaming. someone who had seen the various recentish incarnations of drunken butterfly said my bass was more "dreamy". it didn't feel that dreamy when i was playing all four strings as fast as my wrist would allow. but i take the compliment anyway.

so i worked the bar some. hung around some. basked in rock glory. or something a little less over the top, probably. but anyway, thanks to everyone who made it such a good night. now i can't wait for the next one.

07.11.2008: wow, it's been ages since i've posted any photos. so here's an interesting one:

it looks messed with, but all i did in paintshop was take out a rim. if you can't work out what it is, i'll be posting another one next week that totally gives it away (sorry, don't mean to be a tease).

and if you were wondering what happened to autumn:

and for no reason but cuteness, a tiny snail:

y'know, soya chai ain't so bad. and neither is oat milk chai.

but this guy in my language class, in the break he starts reading "muscles and fitness" magazine. and you thought people like that didn't exist in this world. i guess in my world they don't. or shouldn't. twenty minutes later he's having trouble understanding the danish equivalents of the words "out" and "outside". he can't get it and he's almost arguing with the teacher when he looks around at the class and says "i'm sure no one else gets it either". which is a shame, because the teacher goes from person to person asking them and they all understand perfectly (after 'kober' and 'kober ind' they can take anything). there's nothing wrong with having trouble understanding, everyone in the group struggles at some point (don't get me started on kunde/kender either, that was too much to bare), but getting all macho about was just too much. i think his main problem is the infrequency with which he comes to class. and he hasn't been back since. infact, the turnout has averaged at about six or seven the last couple of weeks. maybe it's the change in weather.

me and the teacher are getting on ok though. it's good. we were talking about tea the other day and it turns out he likes green tea, yet he'd never tried genmaicha. so i bought some in for him ("see, popcorn!"). then yesterday he bought me back some green tea, but i forget its name. it's like the grown up equivalent of the rosy apple.

i'm still not sure about him calling the two chinese girls "kina" though. as in he'll say "there you go china" when it's their turn. but it's weird, because it's like they haven't even noticed. last lesson me and the italian guy couldn't help but make awkward eye contact everytime he did it. he means it in a funny way, but something about it just seems wrong. i don't know.

were not wasting paper [or grammar]
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